Our way of being is not immovable and personal development is there to change all those attitudes or behaviors that are hurting us. It is possible to stop being so apprehensive if you put your mind to it and if you manage your worries correctly. For this, it is as important to do an introspection exercise or look inside yourself as it is to see yourself from a different or external perspective. You dare? Your life will improve if you manage not to worry so much.
Are you apprehensive?
- You worry about everything. Getting sick, losing your job, something happening to your family, your friend’s problem, the distance from your partner… Everything worries you and everything affects you excessively. You know it because you have had to hear a thousand times that you take everything in a tremendous way, that you exaggerate and that you don’t think so much about it. But it’s not easy to stop worrying about everything, right?
- You know you are apprehensive if you get worse when faced with any physical ailment, if you are afraid to go to the doctor because you are sure that he is going to tell you something terrible, if when your mother calls you you think that something bad has happened, if it overwhelms you your friend’s low spirits because you don’t know what to do for her or if you die of anguish every time you argue with your partner.
- These are just some of the situations that give away that you are squeamish. But all this you already imagined, sure. You are a hypochondriac, you have many fears, you frequently suffer emotional overflow, and anxiety is your most faithful companion in life. Okay, you’re squeamish, you worry excessively about everything, and mental fatigue is taking its toll on you. We know that. Now, how to do to change this situation?
Aid! I want to stop being squeamish
- Do not think that apprehension is an immovable characteristic of your personality. Emotional intelligence is for something and it can benefit you when it comes to managing your emotions. But before you get to your emotions… you have to modify your thinking. That distorted thought that leads you to believe that something bad is going to happen.
- Don’t believe everything you think. Thoughts are mere words (even if you don’t pronounce them), they are stories that your mind tells you and they don’t have to be true. You don’t need to investigate whether your bad thoughts are real or not, just analyze whether they are useful to you or not. And no, they are not being useful to you because they are hurting you.
- Don’t confuse intuition with premonition. When you are apprehensive, intuition is distorted and gives way to premonition. Even worse if you are superstitious, because it increases the belief that you cannot control anything that happens in your life. And it’s true that you can’t control everything, but many things can, especially your thinking.
- Remember that you are not a seer and you do not know what is going to happen. That pain in the arm does not have to be a heart attack, but simply a muscle problem. That your boyfriend is not going to stop loving you; or yes, but in any case you cannot predict it. That they are not going to fire you because one day you do not give your best. And that no matter how much you anticipate the disaster, you will not find the solution before.
- Be careful with anticipation, because you can live in a permanent state of self-fulfilling prophecies. Your attitude weighs heavily on what happens to you in life and while it is true that positive thinking does not guarantee a happy life, it is also true that a negative attitude attracts discomfort into your life.
- Relativize. It’s easy to say, right? But you have to try. What is the worst that can happen? Do not spend all day looking for the answer because you know it perfectly. When you notice that a concern is getting the best of you, ask yourself that question and answer yourself. Then look for a solution, if you can do something about it.
- There is an attitude that would be very useful for you to stop being so apprehensive and that is to not be afraid. Fear is what creates apprehension and worry and sometimes it is real and with reason, it is true, but you already know that fear takes away the strength to fight.
- Don’t think you’re going to stop being apprehensive overnight. Take it easy, because changing an attitude takes time, be patient and try to enjoy more of the here and now. You will see how the apprehension weighs less and less.